Tag Archives: 90s comics

90s Comics, 90s Marvel, Uncategorized

Ghost in the Machine (part 1 of 4)

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Greetings, Legions of the Unspoken. Tis I, your loyal narrator, Symbifan. That’s right. I’m back. And boy oh boy, have I been through the emotional ringer since last we spoke. Whew! My father passed away, to state it bluntly. Now, I’m not going to say that the man and I were close, but damn it, we were trying after all these years. Sigh. Anyway, that’s my excuse for my long tardiness in writing this article. I’ve been in a kind of confused haze for way too long. Well, now I’m back and I’m ready to get back to my true passion. That’s right. I’m ready to continue my nude sculptures of Batman. Ha! Anyone that knows me knows that it’d be Superman I’d sculpt in the buff. Jeez! It’s fun to laugh again. Anyway, on to my look back at “Death’s Head II” #1 by Marvel Comics! (Also, if you haven’t heard the guys over at the Unspoken Issues give their expert opinions, I highly recommend you give them a listen! Here’s the link to their podcast on this very storyline: https://youtu.be/lEpAio_wSuM?si=k3xIP0YZlYVTCVc9!)

The robotic bountyhunter, Death’s Head, looked at his surroundings. He was now on a planet called Tyler’s World, within a supposedly impenetrable high-tech base. His target was a male by the name of of Tyler Wilson. Tyler had done well for himself, the hunter mused. This was his planet after all. (I’d get a planet named in tribute to me, but Ultra Sexy World was trademarked already. Damn you, Carrot Top! Always one step ahead of me.) Death’s Head spied a duo of highly armed mercenaries not far from his position. To his dismay, they put up little fight even when they noticed him bearing down on them. Way too easy. Or was it? Several more soldiers surrounded him, attacking fiercely! The robot used his hand-blade to send all of them to their makers and with little effort. Death’s Head did love his work. Three million credits to dispose of someone he wanted to kill anyway? A no-brainer. But as the bountyhunter entered the next room, he finally saw something he wasn’t prepared for. Tyler was strung up in a web of cables! Looming over him was a cyborg that’s tech put his own body to shame! Death’s Head called out for the cyborg to cease it’s attack. This was his prey. Ignoring him, it plunged blades from a weapon/arm into Tyler’s skull! It then stated aloud Tyler’s full name, the number one hundred and three, and that he was now assimilated! Ignoring this, Death’s Head demanded satisfaction for stealing his target! The cyborg looked to him and replied that he had other places to be, but he’d see the bountyhunter again soon. It then teleported away. Death’s Head handled the tracking device in his metallic hand. Sooner than the cyborg thought.

The cyborg arrived within an A.I.M. (Advanced Idea Mechanics) lab in the year 2020. His creator, a redheaded woman by the name of Dr. Evelyn Necker, asked for a status report from the creature. Called Minion, it answered with sarcasm that wasn’t part of her project’s original programming. She was annoyed by this but supposed it was inevitable as the cyborg absorbed parts of it’s targets’ personalities and skills that it found useful to itself. The lab technicians checked Minion out in every way possible, and it prepared to teleport away once again, eager for it’s next kill. Necker did manage to get the name “Death’s Head” from Minion before it disappeared. This mere mention of the robotic bountyhunter caused fear in the usually cold and indifferent doctor for some reason. Dr. Necker called for an emergency meeting of the A.I.M. board of directors immediately. She stated for all of those holographically assembled that she was concerned for the Minion project’s wellbeing as it was growing less and less controllable with every kill and that she required more funding to discover any bugs as this cyborg was created to ensure that A.I.M wasn’t somehow destroyed in the near future. It was to be their ultimate protector. Begrudgingly, the board agreed. (Man, she’s good. I could’ve used her to beg for a higher allowance from my ex-wife. Umm…..I mean…..never mind…..)

It was now the year 2456. The place was the Zeta Reticula quadrant. A rather large, barbarian-like being with a greenish, incectoid hide was demanding knowledge of his future from a bound, pink-skinned female creature! She refused and this was met with a fierce backhand from the monstrous creature! That’s when a robotic voice from behind the two answered for her. His future was to be murdered within minutes at the hands of the Minion cyborg! Minion leapt from his hiding place and attacked immediately! It caused an avalanche of rock with a blast from it’s cannon-arm and turned to the female. And then, it surprisingly freed her. To repay him, she hastily warned him that the alien barbarian wasn’t dead quite yet! And sure enough, he did crawl from underneath the rubble and spring at Minion! A backhand tore half of the flesh from the cyborg’s face and sent him reeling! (Always with the backhand! Anyone else think that this dude’s a space pimp in his spare time? ) But Minion wasn’t beat yet, growing a liquid metal spike in place of his cannon-arm, the cyborg first cut off the beast’s hand! He then followed by impaling him through the chest and then through the mouth! Minion stated that subject one hundred and four was now assimilated. But before he left this desolate scene, the female thanked him. Strangely enough though, she called him Death’s Head! Speaking of Death’s Head, he teleported in seconds later, narrowly missing all of this. But he had a lock on Minion now!

Minion arrived back in the year 2020 with Dr. Necker demanding to check his systems thoroughly. He declined. This angered the good A.I.M. scientist who attempted to order the cyborg into compliance. This verbal fight was interrupted however as Death’s Head crashed through the overhead window! He immediately fired a lazer rifle at Minion’s face as he roared in his hollow-sounding voice about his stolen bounty! As Minion slowly arose, he told the robot to not resist. Confounded, the bountyhunter asked if he was serious. Minion then leapt at him, saying that Death’s Head was in fact his next target! The two tumbled to the ground with a heavy thud! Minion tried to gut Death’s Head with his bladed arm, but the bountyhunter was too fast and used his own blade to impale the cyborg! But Minion did connect next, nearly tearing half of the robot’s head off in one powerful swipe! Minion approached from the rear as Death’s Head tried to recover. Too late. The rest of his head was cut cleanly from his metal neck! Minion wasted no time in absorbing the robot’s skills and traits. That’s when he started to overload! His circuits were on fire! And then, he suddenly stopped. Minion looked to Dr. Necker and told her he was now leaving for his next target. But he spoke as Death’s spoke now, using his expressions! He then teleported away, without another word! Necker turned to a nearby technician and demanded to know the identity of the next name on the cyborg’s hit list. The man replied that he had gone to 1992 to murder Mr. Fantastic of the Fantastic Four! (Was anyone else reminded of Rock em’ Sock em’ Robots during the fight? To the exxxxtreme!)

To be continued…..

Dedicated to the memory of my father, Terry L. Miller. Thanks for buying me this storyline as a kid. It was worth mowing the lawn for after all. Goodbye, Dad.

90s Comics, 90s Marvel, Uncategorized

“Okay, Axis, here we come!” (Part 4 of 4)

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Here we are, folks! The epic finale of the 4-part “Invaders” miniseries! And boy, this series of articles has been a real treat for me to write! I’ve been fascinated by Golden Age superheroes and villains for years and this was an awesome opportunity. Talk about an amazing time to be alive! So many real life heroes and the emergence of real evil in that time period. So, before we begin this story, take a moment to remember your loved ones that fought in this horrific war and be proud of the bravery that they possessed. For they truly were the greatest generation. (Now, as the great sage, Forrest Gump, would say, “That’s all I have to say about that.”)

The villainous Battle-Axis gloat over the mighty Invaders as they are all encased within giant transparent prison cells! Dr. Death muses how America will soon be out of the second World War permanently! The Blazing Skull threatens the Nazi but Captain America calms him. Right now, the bad guys hold all of the cards. The Human Torch demands answers from the Vision. Why would he turn his back on humanity? Did he not realize that if the Nazis win the war, that’ll be the end of life on Earth as they know it? Evil will triumph! Vision merely states that he just wants to return to his home dimension and that life will continue on this planet regardless of his intervention. Cap interrupts. He can almost understand Vision’s point. He isn’t even from here. But the Golem! He’s a Jew! How could he betray his people in such a way? Golem answers that he knows that Dr. Death will most likely not release his brother after he has served him, but he must cling on to this small shred of hope. (Sad. I really feel for the guy. Mostly because he now has to now live in a body constructed of friggin’ clay permanently. I mean, why not adamantium? This is the Marvel Universe for cripes sake! Get inventive, people!)

The Silver Scorpion asks Dr. Death more about his fiendish plan to cause massive earthquakes with the oscillotron that will separate America’s west coast from the rest of the country. He continues though, caught up in his impending victory, and states that this part of the plan is only a trigger for the actual attack! The earthquakes will release poison gas from countless cannisters that were buried near the end of the last World War! This gas will cover thousands of square miles and claim countless lives! The Axis Powers will then be free to destroy Russia without the United States’ interference! To say that the Invaders are appalled and disgusted would be an understatement! But they aren’t alone. Dr. Death’s own men question this next phase of the plan! Surely he isn’t serious! (Man, you know you’re evil when even your minions question if you’re really sure about enacting your sinister scheme!) The Invaders try to escape their individual prisons, but are gassed for this escape attempt. As they sink into slumber, the android hero, the Human Torch, remains conscious! He begins to melt through his cell walls!

He doesn’t get far, however. Sadly, he’s caught by Volton and pummeled until he too is unconscious. Vision then freezes him as he is commanded. Dr. Death continues by ordering Strongman to carry the large doomsday device with them as Volton and Golem remain behind to guard the prisoners. Later, the villains enter a different subterranean chamber. Strongman positions the oscillotron as instructed as Dr. Death checks on Golem’s brother’s work. Johann pleads with the Nazi to not go through with this plan. Of course, this falls upon deaf ears. Dr. Death even adds insult to injury by telling the Jewish scientist that his brother is serving him as the Golem and it’s for his continued safety! Johann is shocked beyond reason! This obvious internal agony pleases the evil Doctor. (I wonder how many years of college are required to become an evil doctor? Asking for a friend…..) Meanwhile, as Volton taunts the awakening heroes, Captain America reveals to the Nazi what he suspects. Volton is in fact an android! Volton is amused and asks for proof. Cap asks why he isn’t burnt from his scuffle with the Human Torch? Why is he the only one who can’t remember his past? Also, remember that this Dr. Death once helped create the robotic Human Torch. He could easily have done so again!

Suddenly enraged, Volton smashes his fist through the Captain’s tube! Cap nods towards Volton’s fist. No blood from the glass! The Blazing Skull chimes in by asking if Volton remembers ever bleeding? Now furious and determined to prove these “fools” wrong, the Nazi takes a large shard of broken glass from the floor and rams it straight through the hand in question! Not one drop of blood! (I knew it from the very beginning! Okay, maybe I didn’t know positively that he was an android, but I suspected he was at least colorblind. I mean, look at his costume! Ugh!). As he marvels at this, Captain America strikes from the hole in his prison wall and connects with a mighty punch! As the villain staggers, Cap emerges, free from his translucent prison! But the Nazi uses his powers over electricity to shock the hero again and again as he stumbles towards his nearby shield! He throws the weapon but Volton dodges easily! The shield sails through the air, smashing through the rest of the Invaders’ cells! Captain America then jumps and kicks the distracted Nazi in the head, knocking him down! When the villain shakes off the stars he’s seeing, he beholds all of the Invaders standing over him! He tries to rise and attack, but Silver Scorpion’s stinger blasts put Volton down for the count! Now for the treacherous Golem…..

But the Golem raises a dismissive hand. He wishes not to fight the heroes. In fact, he’s pondered their words and decided that he will fight at their side! He leads them to where the lab is. At that moment, Golem’s brother has also had a change of heart it seems! Roaring that he will not work for Hitler, no matter the peril, he strikes at the Nazi scientists near him with his bare fists! He then flees the room! Unfortunately for him though, several shots ring out! Nearby, in another room, Dr. Death and his Battle-Axis have heard the gunfire and decided to ignore it. Dr. Death reaches for the lever to activate the oscillotron, but a sudden blast of flame stops him! In flies the Human Torch, followed by the rest of the Invaders! Dr. Death orders his team to attack and Captain America let’s the heroes’ battle cry sound! Both sides clash! In the mighty scuffle, the evil Doctor slips free and runs towards the device to start it! But a wounded Johann lunges at him to stop him! The scientist is shot dead by Sky Shark’s pistol! (Murdered by a dude with a damn fin on his head. No-one deserves to go out like that. Nobody. Sniff…..sob…..)

The Golem sees this through the titanic battle and roars as he tears through the Nazi soldiers in the room as if they’re no more than flimsy rag dolls! Vision hovers over all of this chaos, unmoving, but in deep thought. Dr. Death makes a run for the oscillotron once again and, though Captain America drops him with his thrown shield to the back, manages to start the machine! The madman turns to gloat, but is electrocuted by the flying Volton as he enters the room! Dr. Death is no more! The android then turns his attention to Cap, but the Torch intervenes with a strike in mid-flight! Elsewhere, Silver Scorpion uses her armor’s augmented strength to uppercut Strongman, knocking him stumbling to the floor! Namor flies over the others towards Cap. The Captain asks if even the Sub-Mariner could survive the backlash from destroying the oscillotron. Only one way to find out! The Avenging Son crashes through the enormous machine, creating a large explosion that rocks all involved to their very core! Silence fills the smoke-filled laboratory. (Damn! That was heroic as hell! Cheers to Namor for saving the day as he became no more than stinky, burnt chum. Too soon?)

But the Sub-Mariner did survive! He walked through the smoke, ready to continue the fight against the Battle-Axis! Too late. The villains quickly surrendered. That now taken care of, the heroes wonder if any of the poisonous gas was released in the tremors. Vision answers this question. It was! He points toward a large, leaking pipe! But before anyone can act, the Vision orders everyone to stay back. The smoke from the exploded machine has made it possible for him to create a portal home. He quickly flys in, taking the deadly gas with him! He then seals the mystical door behind himself! (Where’s he when I eat dairy? Hiding I bet. Coward!) Later, the Invaders crawl from a hidden passageway beneath the desert sands, emerging into the clear air. They had won this day not only for America, but for the world.

End.

90s Comics, 90s DC, DC Comics, Uncategorized

A Superman Will Rise (part 2 of 2)

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Happy Holidays, Unspokenites! And welcome back to my look back at the Elseworlds epic from “Superman: The Man of Steel” Annual #3! I know it’s been awhile since part one dropped, but rest assured, your loyal Symbifan never forgot about you. So, that said, I present my gift to you all. Let us return to the conclusion of our story…..

Gotham City. The only place on Earth free of the Kryptonian ultranet and therefore free of the invaders’ supervision. But that didn’t stop them from trying. Presently, an ultranet command outpost had secretly been erected on the outskirts of this old, war-torn city. This had come to the attention of the Human Resistance. Now, armored humans from this secretive sect raised their devastating weapons and fired at the before-mentioned structure. Bazooka shells exploded upon impact at the building’s support beams, causing considerable damage. That is until the lead Resistance fighter is hit in the back by a strange, foam-like substance! The others turn to see Lex Luthor’s high-tech goons hovering close by! (Speaking of bazookas, who remembers when Bazooka Gum had actual comic strips in them? What about what now constitutes as a “prize” in a Cracker Jack box? This now concludes my rant about how I hate the internet. Now, back to my online blog…..)

That’s when a large, metal cable suddenly surrounds Luthor’s men! It then pulls taught and they’re all yanked off of their hovercrafts and into the air by a flying man garbed in red, blue, and gold, the colors of the Human Resistance! It was Kal-El! But he now went by the name that was stitched into the uniform that Batman had gifted him, Superman! (My name’s stitched into my undies. It’s so I don’t forget they’re mine and just how cool I am. Studly.) Superman sets his captives aside and unleashes his heat vision upon the various satellites atop the building! He then utilizes his superior strength to finish off the supports, toppling the entire structure! Swooping to the ground, he lands to check on the band of “renegade” humans’ leader. He is not exactly greeted with open arms.

The captain removes their helmet revealing a woman underneath. She not only doesn’t thank Superman, but states how his Kryptonian aid is not needed. Human beings will win their own planet back. And they’ll do it without the help of one of their oppressors. Her name is Lois Lane. She orders the others to retun to base. As they leave, Superman suddenly takes her into his powerful arms and rockets into the sky! Once they’re alone, her tone of voice changes drastically . She tells him how much she has grown to care for him since he saved her life a mere couple of months ago. Superman hold her tighter as he descends into an apartment building window. They kiss passionately as he carries her towards her bed. (The next part of this scene is rated “R” for graphic, off-panel sexual situations.)

But not all were pleased with this union. Jor-El looked on with the elders of the ill-fated Krypton with looks of revulsion and horror. Superman’s birth father then switched off his overhead monitor. He’d seen enough from the secret viewing device that was planted within Lois’ bedroom. (He watched his own son get busy?! Talk about sick! Not only that, but the old farts from the council watched too?! I think I’m gonna need therapy just from reading this!) The Council of Elders waste little time in proclaiming their verdict. As Kal-El was Jor-El’s son, this was his problem to resolve alone. After the Elders disappeared from view, Jor-El wasted no time in contacting Luthor. He demanded that the human resolve this issue immediately. Lex merely responded that Jor-El possessed the same exact powers as his son. Why not get his own hands dirty for once?

Kal-El awoke and dressed himself. He found Lois at her coffe table, pouring over numerous documents and blueprints. She remarked about the building that Batman had died trying to gain entrance to. The ultranet files on it were definitely incomplete. What was inside that was so important that Bruce would give his life for it? They decided to find out. Lois had heard of the infamous Batcave, so she gave Kal directions as they flew. Soon, they were inside the secret, technological marvel that was Bruce Wayne’s hidden sanctuary. They approached a large computer system and tried to gain access to the files they needed. Sadly, this was to no avail. Password required. Both were then surprised by the voice of a young man that seemed to materialize behind them. (Bruce left an orphan out. He really should take better care of his sidekicks.)

They questioned the youth, but the boy wouldn’t even give his name. All he would say is that he and Bruce had worked together in the past. He did admit that even he didn’t know Bruce’s password. Kal was then struck with inspiration. Wasn’t it rumored that Batman once had a trusted butler? Lois gave Kal a more human name to go by for this next step. She named him after the cigarette brand she used to smoke, Clark. (I smoke Aunt May’s personally. Remember kids, with the act of smoking comes great responsibility.) He added the last name of his beloved foster parents to that and Clark Kent was born. The couple then dresses accordingly and makes their way to a nearby retirement home. It didn’t take long into the conversation to come to the realization that this old man, Alfred, was hopelessly senile. But presented with the name to the building in question, he said one word that struck Clark Kent like a fist, “plague.”

Superman set Lois gently down on her feet in her apartment upon their return. He looked shaken. When questioned, he told her of a genetic flaw that plagued his people. A flaw that was a leftover from Krypton’s Clone Wars. (I wonder if that villainous Emperor Palpatine was up to his old tricks against the Jedi? Yeah. I know. You all saw a Star Wars joke coming. Have I become that predictable? Sigh…..) It was almost as if their very planet wanted them all dead. Being born here, Kal-El was immune. And now that Clark knew what that building contained, he knew what he must do. Come morning, he would break into this complex and release this plague upon the world. It wouldn’t take long before he was the last remaining Kryptonian on Earth. Lois tried to comfort him throughout the night. But when she awakens the next the morning, Clark is gone.

Panicked, Lois grabs for her phone. Surprisingly, the man that answers on the other end is none other than Lex Luthor! Lois begins by telling Lex that the plan has gone awry. Luthor replies that if anything has gone awry with their plan, it’s that she’s letting her feelings for this alien cloud her judgement. Ignoring this, she reports that Kal-El is gone. Before Lois can continue, Jor-El bursts in through her front door! Terrified, Lois goes for her gun, but using his heat vision, he melts the weapon! Grabbing her up by the throat, he demands to know his son’s whereabouts. Lex answers through a planted spy device that he’s pleased to see Jor-El finally lifting a finger himself. What’s his next move? Jor-El looks to the device’s screen with obvious rage and replies that he’s bringing his son home, no matter the cost! The screen goes dead, leaving Lex Luthor to ponder if he has just overplayed his hand. (This place has more bugs than a roach motel! Am I right, folks?)

Clark sat at the Kents’ dinner table in Kansas. After his adoptive father returned from tending to the fields, Clark rose to his feet and asked both of the people that had raised and cared for him if he could keep the Kent name. Of course they were overjoyed. He then asked for their advice. If he were to release this plague, Earth would be free. But he would have committed mass-genocide upon his own people. What should he do? Before much could be said, a voice from the doorway spoke. It was Lex! He was sorry to interrupt, but there was a situation….. (Is it me, or is Luthor in almost every scene, working every single angle in this issue? I don’t know how he keeps track of which side he’s on at the moment! No wonder he was elected President of the United States in later storylines!)

Superman rocketed through the skies at top speed! When he reached Gotham City, his fears were confirmed. Jor-El had gone mad! He was hovering above the people with a large vehicle raised over his head as a weapon, firing heat vision down at the screaming crowds! He demanded he see his son right now! Superman rams his shoulder into his father’s ribcage with all of his might, sending the crazed Kryptonian flying! He then catches the plummeting vehicle and sets it down on the street carefully. But this action took far too long! Seeing his chance, Jor-El blasts his son off of his feet with a full blast of heat vision! (It’s definitely on now! I don’t see a Father’s Day card in Jor-El’s future! Maybe a tie, but that’s a given.)

The battle then takes to the skies! Back and forth fists are thrown that could topple mountains! But Jor-El simply doesn’t have the fighting experience that his son does. Superman throws him through a nearby water tower. And before he can fully get back to his feet, Clark unleashes the fullest extent of his heat vision! Jor-El falls, unconscious at last! Superman arrived at the building in question in a flash. He punched through the thick steel of the wall and flew in. Lex Luthor sat nonchalantly in a lawn chair on the other side! In his hand was a drink with a little umbrella leaning lazily inside. Superman went for the proper panel to release the plague. Nothing. Luthor had rewritten the circuit board! (Does anyone get what side this guy’s on? I feel like I’m trying to do algebra here!)

Lex explained that the Kryptonian race, though arrogant, didn’t deserve to die. Kal could teach them a better way. Tired of Luthor’s numerous head games, Superman grabbed him up by his armor and smashed him through several floors of the building! He demanded that Lex fix the panel. Luthor’s reply was a blast of green energy from a cavity within the armor’s chest! As he stood up, he grabbed an large iron bar. He explained that Jor-El had equipped him with a weapon powered by a small rock called Kryptonite. He then finished by gleefully striking the hero again and again with the weapon! Kal stirred to rise, but Lex revealed a large chunk of rock within his armor! It seems that Luthor wasn’t content to simply subdue Superman, he was going to kill him! But as he raised the bar for a final strike, he was shot from behind! Lois Lane stood with a smoking energy rifle! (Now she’s on Superman’s side?! Anyone have a scorecard I can look over?)

Luthor lies there demanding to know why. Her only reply as she helped Superman to his feet was that she loved him. Not to be defeated yet, Lex’s armor shot out several blasts of energy! Unfortunately for him, he missed his intended targets. He did however hit the weakened support beams above him! A large chunk of the complex came crashing down upon him. It was over. Superman never did use the deadly Kryptonian plague. Instead, he began work on teaching them a better way. Luthor was right after all. Speaking of Lex Luthor, though badly injured, he managed to survive too. As Superman raised the new flag of humanity atop a large building, he looked down to see a strange black car race by below. Batman sat within with a familiar youngster dressed in a colorful costume. Batman slowed the Batmobile long enough to smile at Superman and say, “Welcome to the party, pal.” (Batman survived too?! I feel like my brain just turned to jelly! This comic had more twists and turns than a “Pirates of the Caribbean” flick! Jack Sparrow 4-Life, y’all!) Superman smiled back and flew onwards. Batman was right. The fight had only just begun.

End.