Six Weeks of Punishment: Deadly Knights



Hello, Legions of the Unspoken!

I sure hope you enjoyed the first installment in our Six Weeks of Punishment leading up to Daredevil Season 2!  Emily and I had a ton of fun doing the podcast, and speaking of a ton of fun, the 90’s were saturated in the form of fun that only arrives in the form of an inter-company crossover!

Speaking of crossovers, you’re well aware that we’re heading quickly toward the Daredevil crossover with Punisher, but let’s also keep in mind that we are rapidly approaching the Batman/Superman movie as well!  We have’t seen this many crossovers since…well…the 90’s!

There were possibly too many crossovers at the time, but you couldn’t convince me so then, and you’d still have difficulty convincing me so now.  While there were some real stinkers and some cash grab crossovers, I was still entranced by the idea of characters meeting that rarely met.  I wanted to see the outcomes of these fights!  I wanted the supporting characters to interact. There’s something magical about these stories to me, and sadly, the first Batman/Punisher crossover, Lake of Fire, just didn’t capture that for me.  I’m not a big Denny O’Neil guy, and he wrote that one in a way that sort of embodied what naysayers say about crossovers.  The book did look good, and redemption was possible because Punisher/Batman:  Deadly Knights would emerge next.

Deadly Knights washed the bad taste of Lake of Fire out of my mouth with the ferocity of a fire hose.  Of course, it doesn’t hurt that the creative team of Chuck Dixon, John Romita, Jr., and Klaus Janson did what i feel is still the best Punisher story of all time, and Chuck Dixon certainly knew his way around the Batfamily as well, with long runs in that area of comics, including his excellent treatment of both Nightwing and Robin (Tim Drake).

Dixon knows how to craft an action story.  I probably read more of his stuff in the 90’s than anyone else’s.  Every month, I could expect MULTIPLE solid action tales from his pen alone than some writers could do in a year.  JRJR and Janson also certainly make his tale come to light.  They waste no time. From the moment the cover is opened, we see Punisher raining fire upon the savage mooks of Gotham City in his quest to find Jigsaw.

Punisher & Batman - Deadly Knights #446 - Page 5
People from NYC  in comic books talk about Gotham City the way people in real life talk about NYC.  (I kid, I kid!)

The place is surrounded by Gotham’s finest, but Commissioner Gordon doesn’t think any of this apocalyptic gunfire is worth risking any of Gotham’s finest over.  He’s probably right, as you can tell from the picture above, Punisher and these goons are in a gunfight, and as much as I love Punisher, he’s definitely not worth risking any cop lives over.

Gordon is the most hands-on police commissioner in history.  He’s at every firefight.  How does he get any paperwork done?

After Punisher manages to plant a few rounds in some paint vats, he blows up the place BECAUSE PUNISHER.  He moves in to question the surviving mook (being the last guy to survive a firefight with the Punisher is like winning a lottery where the prize is being slow-cooked in a vat of creamed corn like on that one Halloween episode of Roseanne.  What did you really get?) when everyone’s favorite flying rodent-styled-vigilante arrives on the scene, as he is wont to do when people are shooting paint vats in Gotham City.

Punisher & Batman - Deadly Knights #446 - Page 9
Not gonna lie-Commissioner Gordon has a rather Cavalier attitude about his public responsibility.  If anyone is alive in there, shouldn’t public servants try and save them, even if they are criminals?  Also, note the capitalization of Cavalier; that’s a Batman joke for both of you who’ll get it.

Of course, Punisher has his own ideas, despite Batman’s presence.  What’s especially interesting about this crossover is that the last time Frank Castle met Batman, it wasn’t really Batman (Bruce Wayne).  It was Jean-Paul Valley, better known as Azrael, also known as THE CLAWED TANK WHO WOULD BE BATMAN.

No matter what he may say or think about Batman, I bet Punisher could get behind claws that fire rockets.

One of the first things Castle figures out here is that this Batman isn’t the same as the Batman he already fought with and beside.  For all of the stuff we love about Punisher, I feel like his detective skills are one of the things that we don’t discuss enough.  It takes him maybe 14 seconds to figure out what it took Gordon weeks to figure out; it’s also something I do not believe Superman ever figured out. (I’m possibly wrong about this.  Correct me in the comments if so!)

Punisher manages to question the lone surviving mook, but Batman shows up, Punisher figures out who he is, and Batman proceeds to engage Frank in a fistfight.  Normally it’d be a huge mistake to take on a gun-wielding Punisher with just your fists, but this is Batman.

Punisher & Batman - Deadly Knights #446 - Page 11
Almost is underlined so you know just how almost Batman feels.

The mook Punisher was trying to question gets away and makes his way back to his boss, Jigsaw.  Jigsaw came to Gotham City in the last Batman/Punisher crossover, as he wants to move on the mobs here to get away from the heat of NYC.  It seems like he would have opened up shop somewhere not famous for having the world’s most prominent vigilante in it.  Maybe somewhere like Dos Rios, Texas?

Wait, this guy is in Dos Rios.  There’s no safe place for a crime lord, Jigsaw.

The mook promised Jigsaw that he said nothing about him to Punisher, but Jigsaw’s partner, The Joker, doesn’t believe him and shoots him.  Or maybe Joker did believe him and shot him anyway.  There’s no telling, y’all.  IT’S THE JOKER.

Punisher & Batman - Deadly Knights #446 - Page 15
We get it, Joker. We get it.

Of course, everything isn’t Joker’s-lips rosy between these two.  Jigsaw is mad about not having made more headway into the Gotham City gang scene, and he lets Joker know this in a very diplomatic fashion.  He tears the place apart.  Of course, Joker is an insane and evil clown, so he isn’t impressed and reiterates to Jigsaw that Joker’s plan is the best. Once they get in, Jigsaw will be entrenched.  Also, as a bonus, Joker has gotten Jigsaw’s face fixed.  I’d wonder why Joker doesn’t get his own face fixed, but then I’d be wondering about The Joker, and I am quite sure that doing so for too long will just render one mad.

One of my favorite aspects of this book is how both Batman and Punisher find the other one to be crazy.  They each claim that they are the proper response to the criminal element and that the other is nuts.  It’s like watching Ed Gein and Jeffery Dahmer call each other cannibals.  You listen because it’s interesting while knowing that the pot is calling the kettle black, or in this case Bat.  Of course, in their worlds, the other is the one that is off his rocker.  Punisher doesn’t get it when it comes to Batman because he isn’t a wanton murderer, while Batman doesn’t get Punisher because Punisher IS a wanton murderer.  If this wasn’t about wanton murder, I reckon they could agree to disagree, but that seems like too an intense a topic to let drop easily.

Batman can’t let Jigsaw’s presence in Gotham City drop easily.  Of course, neither can Punisher, who’s brought Microchip with him to help gather information.  Both Microchip and Batman are asking and answering the most important question in this scenario…

Punisher & Batman - Deadly Knights #446 - Page 17
Yeah, Micro, Batman’s the crazy one.
Punisher & Batman - Deadly Knights #446 - Page 18
Gang Wars that play it a little closer to the vest are ok, though.

Of course, the information that one can glean from a computer is limited, or at least it was in 1994, what with having to use an AOL floppy disc to get going.  Think about that; despite how impressive that Batcomputer looks above, it was still using dial-up.  You hearing the modem noise?  GOOD.

Since one can only learn so much, both Punisher and Batman take to the streets in their own ways to get more intelligence.  Of course, with Batman, this means we get to see the awesome and infamous MATCHES MALONE.

Punisher & Batman - Deadly Knights #446 - Page 22
Does Batman always drive with his pinkie or is that just something he does to throw folks off from thinking he is Matches Malone?

Frank Castle’s cell phone looks about 10 years ahead of its time, so perhaps the Batputer from earlier at least has DSL.  Matches is driving around a gangster, Jimmy Navarone.  Jimmy just happens to be the next target of Jigsaw and Joker in their bid to move up the Gotham Mob Ladder. (That should be either the name of a story of some sort of awesome Batman accessory.)

 A key point above is Frank asking Microchip to nose around in Navarone’s computer business, which it leads us to some Hackers-style…well…er…um…hacking between Robin (Tim Drake) and Microchip.  This is a neat little bit here, and it’s so cool to see Batman’s supporting cast in this crossover.  It’d have been much easier to just have Punisher and Batman punch each other in the shadows of the Bat-Signal, which has somehow been changed into a skull for most of the comic, but instead, by getting to see Batman’s supporting cast, even if it’s just seeing Alfred being delightfully snooty for just a second, Dixon has deftly given anyone who picked this up that didn’t already follow Batman a sense of Batman’s world that may entice them into pickling up another issue.  We also see all of Punisher’s supporting cast, which really just  means Microchip, once again, BECAUSE PUNISHER.

I suppose Jigsaw could sort of count, as he’s been around Punisher for quite some time.  I honestly think he has the superpower of being the only guy throughout all of history and time that Punisher is unable to kill.

Back to the story, Navarone is living it up at the clubs, and Punisher has grown tired of waiting.  He walks by Matches, but he doesn’t make him.  Also, let the hack-duel begin!

Punisher & Batman - Deadly Knights #446 - Page 23
I don’t know if what Robin is saying is really computer talk or not, and I don’t care.  That sounds cool as hell!

Despite seemingly having an open invitation to the depraved (I’m basing this on the crazy look that duck is giving us in the lower right panel), The Toy Box actually is very selective in regard to its clientele, as Frank Castle learns very quickly upon entering the establishment.

Punisher & Batman - Deadly Knights #446 - Page 24

Punisher has a scar but Jigsaw doesn’t.  Nice.

Yep, that’s Jigsaw, and he is looking good!  Jigsaw just can’t resist messing with Frank Castle before he offs him, and I just had to show you the best possibly glimpse at Jigsaw’s new face as he does it.

As you see above as well, Batman is on his way to The Toy Box, where you just know that this “conversation” between Jigsaw and Frank Castle isn’t going especially well.  Of course, we can’t forget that the reason that Jigsaw and Joker are even there is because they are chasing Navarone in order to remove him from the Gotham City Mob power structure.  First, though, let’s get Punisher some guns.

Punisher & Batman - Deadly Knights #446 - Page 26
Somehow Joker peering between the piano and its cover is one of the creepiest Joker panels I have ever seen.

While all this is going on, the Hack-Joust between Microchip and Robin comes to a close, and you see just why he’s the Boy Wonder!

Punisher & Batman - Deadly Knights #446 - Page 27
If your name is Microchip, you’ve sort of got to win your computer battles; it’s all you have got.

Robin seems to think that Batman is missing all of the action, which is sort of like thinking that someone on a boat in the middle of the Pacific Ocean could miss all the water.  Dude, the action is all around him.  Batman being Batman, he jumps right in, with Bat-Bombs flying.

Batman doesn’t recognize Jigsaw based purely on his voice, but he does recognize someone else’s voice despite the cacophony that must be reverberating in this building, what with all the gunfire, explosions, Bat-Bombs, and ninja kicking going on.

Punisher & Batman - Deadly Knights #446 - Page 29
Wouldn’t it be more mysterious if he left his logo off of everything?  On the other hand, I’m totally in for the Bat-Bomb Batman action figure variant.

The world catches fire as Punisher and Batman join forces to get out of this maelstrom, although neither of them seem to be especially happy about it.  Of course, how happy is Punisher supposed to be?  It’s barely 18 seconds into this fight and he has already gotten shot.

Punisher & Batman - Deadly Knights #446 - Page 30
Only The Punisher would call Batman a Boy Scout.

In the midst of all the fighting, Punisher gets Batman some breathing room by, you know, blowing folks away.  This distracts Punisher enough to enable Jigsaw to sneak up on our beloved vigilante, but it also costs Jigsaw dearly…

Punisher & Batman - Deadly Knights #446 - Page 33
Yep, horseshoes and buckshot grenades.  Just like they say, close counts there.

I think there are three moments in this book that everyone was waiting for, and we’re about to hit all three of then in rapid order.  The first one happens right now, as the shit has hit the fan, there are mooks everywhere, and the only thing that can save the day is Batman and Punisher, side-by-side, taking out or taking down every Gotham mobster in sight.

Of course, what fun would this be if our two vigilantes didn’t toss a barb or two at one another, and how could this guy be Batman if he didn’t tell Castle to leave town when his immediate killing is over.

Punisher & Batman - Deadly Knights #446 - Page 34
Um, that’s why he has Robin, Frank.

The fight breaks down, and Batman winds up taking on Jigsaw while Punisher chases down The Joker.  The Batman vs. Jigsaw fight is as uninteresting as it sounds like, and I don’t find this to be the fault of the creators.  The fracas looks and sounds as good as it could, but at the end of the day, it’s Batman vs. Jigsaw.  Even with Jigsaw’s facial road map, I am sure that dealing with Two-Face the second of every month has Batman finely attuned to the nuances of dealing with those afflicted with severe facial scarring.  He shows it by making short work of Jigsaw.

What’s much more interesting is Frank Castle vs. The Joker.  Of all of Batman’s opponents, The Joker is the one that you routinely hear come up in the constant “should Batman kill?” debates.  There’s a very strong argument that he is a deadly force that should be eradicated.  To Batman, the stronger argument is that he is a person and so he’s entitled not to be murdered.  This is sort of what makes Batman Batman at his core.  Despite his brutality, there’s a core of decency that enables Batman to provide even The Joker with respect for him as a human being.

Punisher, of course, is bereft of all of that, and thinks the best thing he could do for The Joker is put a bullet right in his brain.

Punisher & Batman - Deadly Knights #446 - Page 41
I am pretty sure the joke is that they’re both nuts.
Punisher & Batman - Deadly Knights #446 - Page 42

Castle was this close to killing The Joker, but Batman stepped in to stop him.  Of course, Punisher isn’t going to take that lying down, which leads to our final of the big three moments, which is Punisher hitting Batman with a punch; you gotta buy the book to see that one!

As much as I love The Punisher, I’d be the first to admit that Batman could take him in hand-to-hand combat.  I think it’d be a little harder than most folks that I know, but that may be because of my love of the character.  I honestly wish we had seen a bit more of the two of them fighting in this book, but the story moves along well without it.  I don’t miss it as I read it, but afterwards, I notice it in reflection.

In the last of their encounter, Batman takes Punisher down again, saying that while Punisher may have been entitled to one punch, it’s just going to be the one.  Batman takes advantage of one last opportunity to call Frank Castle crazy.  So he responds by calling Batman crazy.

I’m not sure who wins the scowl-off here.  Both competitors are quite impressive.

The books ends with Punisher leaving Gotham City and heading back to a New York City that he knows and understands, which is the only ending the book really could have had.

All in all, this was a quite satisfying read.  Some of it moves a bit fast for my tastes, but there was a lot to squeeze in here, especially when considering that there’d be no opportunity for a follow-up issue.  Fans of both Batman and Punisher will be happy, and a fan just looking for an event would get those three big moments.

I have to give credit to Richard Starking and Comicraft for the lettering job as well.  The captions for Punisher and Batman really stand out and add a level of depth to this story.  I love it when I get to see creators take advantage of the little things that only comic books can do to add depth to a story.

That’s it for Round 2 of your Six Weeks of Punishment, Legions! Thanks for coming to Gotham City with Frank and I! Be here this weekend when Emily Scott shows us how Punishment will work in the future world of Marvel 2099!!!!

Six Weeks of Punishment: Over the Edge Podcast!

Greetings, Legions of the Unspoken! It’s an exciting time here at The Unspoken Decade as we gear up for our very own Dean Compton’s favorite character to make a first appearance on Netflix’s Daredevil! And no, folks, I’m not talking about Elektra. It’s none other than Mr. Frank Castle, the one and certainly the only, Punisher. And what better way to get psyched for his debut than Six Weeks of Punishment?

This weekend Mr. Compton will bring you Punisher and Batman: Deadly Knights, and I, Emily Scott, will take a look at Punisher 2099 shortly after that. We are kicking off Six Weeks of Punishment, though, with the event that launched the short-lived Marvel Edge imprint, Over the Edge, a showdown of Castle versus Nick Fury that includes Daredevil, Doctor Strange, Ghost Rider, and Hulk’s titles. Take a listen to mine and Dean’s podcast below, take a look at some sweet very 90s covers, and take another trip back to the Unspoken Decade this weekend for more punishment. For the next six weeks, we’re all gluttons.

Never Send a Woman to Do a Woman’s Job: Justice League Task Force #7 & 8 by Emily Scott

Greetings, Legions of the Unspoken! With the holidays and the general life-iness of life, it’s been a while since we met like this, hasn’t it? (Every way I try to say this makes me feel like Mr. Rogers.) Fear not, though, since it’s time once again to take a look into another comic book from that most misunderstood decade. We’ll get right back in the swing of things with a fun two-issue story, Justice League Task Force #7 and #8.

There is no other way to summarize this comic than to say it’s the one where Martian Manhunter turns into a hot chick. Sure, other things happens, but if this were a Friends episode, it would definitely be called The One Where J’onn Is J’oan. (Considering this is a 90s comic website, I feel it’s only fitting and, more importantly, more amusing to keep my references era-appropriate.)

My Stars
While Gypsy has chosen a Southern-inspired “Oh, my stars!” reaction, Wonder Woman has opted for the still popular “Home Alone.” (I told you I can keep the 90s references coming all day.)

This Justice League Task Force, whose monthly title spun off of Justice League Europe in 1993 and ran just over three years, was formed by U.N. representative Hannibal Martin with Martian Manhunter at the helm and boasted a revolving line up depending on the mission. In this particular instance, Martin assembles a team to rescue one Agent Henry Haggard, who has managed to get his hands on some terrorists’ “McGuffin virus,” the name of which should tell how important it is in and of itself to the actual story. Haggard is then unfortunately left to die in the unlikeliest of places and taken captive by a subterranean, green all-female society.

Deepest Africa
Deepest Africa. As opposed to Shallowest Africa? Most Pretentious Asia? Maybe that’s where they speak the Pakistanian.

Haggard’s lady captors, the Daals (*small, begrudging groan*), will allow ambassadors to collect him, but they must be female. If you think these ladies are chosen just for being any old skirts, though, oh ho, how wrong you’d be! Wonder Woman is selected for being from an all-female society, Maxima for her psionic powers and status as a sovereign, Vixen and Gypsy for their respective animal and camouflage powers being useful in a jungle, Dolphin because the passageway to this part of Deepest Africa is underwater, and Martian Manhunter for being….green?

No, really, that’s all the justification we get why a dude has to go to the place where dudes are banned. Martin says it and they all stare at Martian Manhunter expectantly like it makes perfect sense. Well, that and his being the task force’s usual leader, which, sure, I get, but it still kind of seems like the team of women with super powers, which includes at least two sovereigns, would be able to, you know, conduct a mostly diplomatic mission to rescue some guy on their own just this once.

Of course, without Martian Manhunter turning into Martian Womanhunter there is no story here, and while I feel it’s necessary to at least address the silliness of the premise, from the start it’s plain that writer Peter David intends a fun and lighthearted tone for these issues and doesn’t really have much of an agenda as far as gender politics go. There are plenty of playful jokes along the “men won’t stop for directions” line, but it’s all pretty good spirited and doesn’t feel too cheap. For instance, when Martian Manhunter procures a romantic movie to entertain his teammates, their reaction is charmingly and decidedly mixed.

Thanks, Blue Beetle.

I like that Wonder Woman is apparently a sap. I like that Gypsy thinks it’s hysterical. I like that Maxima thinks it’s horrible. I like that there doesn’t really have to be any more to it than that. I like that it feels like a reaction you would realistically get if you put a group of women with strong and wildly disparate personalities in front of a romance flick. (I was going to say, “Hey, remember when we called them flicks?” and then I remembered Netflix.)

Considering those strong and proud personalities involved, my first inclination was to be skeptical that none of the women on the team would take issue with needing a man on an all-female mission, but I feel like those with the strongest objections would be the ones cackling at An Affair to Remember and, therefore, equally willing to have a good chuckle at Martian Manhunter’s discomfort at having to grow boobs. (Well, to be fair, they all find that funny.)

Joan Jonzz
My first reaction was that the costume is awfully skimpy, but once I thought about it for a second, I realized Martian Manhunter’s regular costume already looked like something from the Hawkeye Initiative.

I can tell the Internet has scarred me forever when I have to keep reminding myself this is a comic book and not just especially well drawn fan art. Like could have forgotten I was writing an article and not just on Tumblr when I looked away from the screen momentarily. I am so used to coming across an inordinate amount of racy drawings of my favorite characters that when I see boob straps and bikini-bottomed genderbent Martian Manhunter, I assume someone only drew it for titillation, even though this comic is from a time when such art would have been, presumably, private collection only. (At least I hope so.) And then it’s depressing that I just expect this lady version of Martian Manhunter to be bent over something and spread wide open in the next panel.

To be clear, I certainly have no problem with people drawing and sharing whatever weirdo drawings their hearts and other organs desire, but it’s interesting how much twenty-plus years on the Internet, coming across detailed drawings of beloved characters’ genitals without seeking them out, tends to reduce the novelty of something like Martian Manhunter as a lady. None of that, of course, is this comic’s fault.

It’s also not the comic’s fault, nor is it yours, that in the course of my research I found this picture, which someone with no small amount of actual talent felt it necessary to create, but if I had to see it, so do you.

Now that everyone looks the part and has the majority of the giggles out of their system, the task force sets off on their rescue/diplomacy mission, which, of course, encounters peril on the way. The one (and only) thing you need to know about this bit is that that they shoot Dolphin out of the torpedo tube.

Even though it almost certainly wouldn’t be as much fun as it looks here to be shot out of a torpedo tube, I can’t be the only one who’s a little jealous.

The only thing you need to know about the next bit is that once they fight off the Daals and are found worthy, they are taken to their leader, Her Who Must Be Served. Her takes one look at J’oan J’onzz in all her green glory and is, of course, instantly smitten, declaring that J’oan will be her mate. (Ugh, just like a girl to skip over the action to get to the romance, amirite? Maybe if someone had sent a man along with me to write this article, I’d have included more of the fighting.)

Having watched a fair amount of science fiction where the one lady in the group is always getting captured by natives, only to have their leader fall for her, it’s a nice change of pace when the trope is twisted or subverted, even if the guy in this scenario still has to be a lady at the time for it to happen to him. Once again, it’s happened more frequently since 1994, and if any nerd tells me they don’t think of this when they think of this premise, I’ll call them a liar.

Despite what the cover of Issue #8 would have you believe, J’oan is treated quite well in captivity. The rest of the task force is viewed with considerably more wariness, thus proving the old cliche that women are just naturally suspicious of and incapable of getting along with other women (especially when a man is involved, even if they don’t know he’s a man). Considering there is no scenario even remotely close to the one depicted here, I have to assume those are purely metaphorical snakes, and as such, it’s a fairly accurate representation of what it’s like to be a lady sometimes.

Welcome to the Sisterhood, J’oan!

J’oan is prepared for the wedding and continues to play along in the hopes of peacefully finding Haggard and the virus (and, let’s be honest, because she’s a bit of a tease). Gypsy, who has been camouflaging herself to stay with J’oan, tells her to take some Midol when she complains of feeling tense and irritable, a moment I enjoy because it’s possibly the only time someone has ever offered Midol in the interest of being helpful and not as a sarcastic PMS joke. (I mean, it’s a bit of a sarcastic PMS joke too, but still.) J’oan also begs Gypsy not to tell Blue Beetle, Batman, or any other pals about this mission, which is a shame because I’d love to read a comic of nothing but this story being explained to Batman. Hell, if I weren’t this far in already, I might rewrite this whole article and address it to Batman. (If he’s not an insufferable gossip, why is he spying on everyone all the time, huh?)

While they wait for their next move, the hens get to clucking about a lady sovereign wanting a lady mate. Maxima says some homophobic and sexist stuff and then uses the tried and true, “I’m not a bigot, but…” Wonder Woman calls her out before turning into tea drinking Kermit.

None of my Business
Yes, women make this sort of joke, and frequently.

Gypsy, to answer Dolphin’s question, is off finding Haggard, who sees her, hears her name, and asks her if she’s the Gypsy, the stripper. Small piece of advice for the gentlemen out there: one of the few things worse than asking a lady if she needs a Midol is assuming she is a stripper, especially if she is in a position to save your life. She leaves him where he is so as not to arouse suspicion (and also probably the stripper thing), and the wedding proceeds as planned.

I love weddings
Dolphin, seen here demonstrating that any fictional wedding, no matter how forced or foolish, must be accompanied by someone funny crying or saying they love weddings.

I can’t help but shake my head that they can show two supposedly female characters standing together on their own marriage altar, holding their faces two inches from each other, specifically articulate that they are kissing, and still not show them actually kiss. It’s hard to come down too harshly on a comic from 1994, though, when depicting any kind of same sex relationship is something that is still a struggle to this day with comic books and cartoons. This would even be just about the least controversial circumstance in which two ladies could kiss, considering that, strictly speaking, neither of them are actually ladies.

Yes, that’s right. Her Who Must Be Served, in a twist no one could have possibly seen coming, is a hermaphrodite. I have to say, I kept waiting for a crass joke or something we’d feel a lot more uncomfortable reading now than we would have twenty years ago, not because I go out of my way to look for these things but because nothing was the subject of more punchlines in the 90s than “chick with dick” jokes. (Just ask Eddie Murphy.) Well, unless it was a straight guy character vigorously assuring another male character that he isn’t gay but is totally cool with it if anyone else is. There’s pretty much just a Crying Game reference, though, and they move on. (And to be honest, if they hadn’t made the Crying Game reference, I would have felt obligated to myself, what with the fuss I made about 90s jokes and all.)

Crying Game
If it’s big enough for Vixen and Maxima to see from way the hell up there, I don’t blame J’oann for feeling apprehensive.

Martian Manhunter, of course, decides this charade has gone on long enough, and reasserts his masculinity in a shower of muscles:

Geez, we get it.

Meanwhile, Wonder Woman has been busy saving Haggard and Dolphin has found the virus, so the task force fights their way to freedom. They escape as far as a volcano and fly away, all except Martian Manhunter, who is paralyzed by his fear of fire. Her Who Must Be Served catches up and rages out on him, thinking that they have been laughing at Her. Their tussle almost puts them both in the volcano because what’s the point of having a volcano if someone doesn’t at least almost fall in it? Martian Manhunter manages to save them both, and they part on surprisingly cordial terms, considering that they’ve both had kind of a weird day. Her even tells him that he can come back if he ever changes his mind, and he considers it at least enough to tell his task force that it’s tempting.

All in all, a fun read with some great banter between the characters and not nearly as many groans as I would have expected. I haven’t mentioned the art yet (penciled by Sal Velluto, inked by Jeff Albrecht with Aaron McClellan, and colored by Glenn Whitmore), but I enjoyed it quite a bit as well. It’s colorful and vibrant and dynamic, and some of the facial expressions alone were worth the read.

This One
Like this one.

Must like the task force itself, JLTF have a revolving door of writers and artists, so I can’t vouch for what the rest of the title is like, but what I can vouch for is that Dean Compton and I are going to have a great time with our next podcast (which I’m still lobbying to be called The Spoken Decade), all about the Over the Edge crossover event! No one is more excited for the Punisher’s return to the screen than Dean Compton, so you won’t want to miss out on his thoughts on Over the Edge or on some of the other Punisher stuff we’ll be taking a look at in the coming weeks! Till then!